February 2010
Brick fucking Wall.
The only problem is when I have to come back home. I hate it here.
Feb 28th
music > everyone, and everything. I think that’s why I’ve had so many issues.  I haven’t been able to write and play music, the right way. I hope so at least. I don’t feel the same as I did two, or even really one month ago.  I just feel so much better. I don’t need anything but music. truthfully.
Feb 26th
Feb 26th
Feb 26th
you really are the most idiosyncratic person I’ve ever met in my entire life. even more so than myself.
Feb 23rd
we are nowhere and it's now.
f you hate the taste of wine Why do you drink it until you’re blind? And if you swear that there’s no truth and who cares, How come you say it like you’re right? Why are you scared to dream of God When it’s salvation that you want? You see stars that clear have been dead for years But the idea just lives on In our wheels that roll around As we move over the ground ...
Feb 23rd
fuck dill.
notevendillmusic: (via zackhames)
Feb 22nd
fuck dill.
Feb 22nd
You know when you have those memories you hate to think about? and every time it comes up in your mind you feel sick to your stomach and try to rid the thought? So many of those feelings and thoughts are gone.  I still remember what I did and what happened but it’s like looking at it through different eyes.  It’s like it wasn’t even me who was the one committing the act, I was...
Feb 22nd
I used to be a lot more open than I am now reading back to old conversations and blog posts…I kind of keep everything in, more so than I used to.  a lot of the time I look back to things I said maybe a month ago and they’re so indirect I don’t even remember what it’s talking about. maybe that’s a good thing.
Feb 22nd
I’m done with this.
Feb 22nd
Everyone is 95% the same. but it’s the 5% difference that shows through.
Feb 21st
I hate it too.
Morning gray ignites a twisted mess of foreign shapes and sounds, I wish the ceiling was the ground. I’ll send you flowers made of silent tiny pieces of the sun To help me make up for this one. While you send me tidal waves of love when you’re alone, and I can’t remember what you do. To find a way to turn the signal back to heaven sounding blue, And bring me faithful back to...
Feb 21st
Hum is my favorite band. ever.
Feb 21st
fuck.
Feb 21st
Wavering Radiant
so good.
Feb 19th
i’m fucking stupid.
Feb 19th
Feb 17th
788 notes
Feb 17th
975 notes
this is something I have to do for myself
finally. some closure. sort of.
Feb 17th
I wish school was spending 8 hours a day playing music and writing.  Creative school. Life would be infinitely better that way if they offered such a thing. An entire school, dedicated to writing, music, art, photography, film, physical art, painting, drawing, experimenting, speaking, doing something, outlets, and something other than numbers and book reports. Sadly this won’t happen.
Feb 17th
you’re fucking gross.
Feb 17th
1 note
You don’t even seem real anymore. It’s like nothing happened.  It never happened. what the fuck.
Feb 16th
Listenianpaxson: fuckyeahsweetmusic: Can I Kick It?...
Feb 15th
62 notes
I really miss summer.
Feb 15th
Feb 15th
25 notes
slow to learn.
trying to say something?
Feb 13th
Feb 13th
I think.
I’m starting to understand.  I think I’m starting to do the right thing.  I think I’m starting to think the right thing. I think I’m starting to get what is going on. I hope this is starting over. Slow down. p.s.  Nobody sings anymore.  I’m not sure why I didn’t listen to this album sooner. what stuck out: Well, she found a love and he found a victim. he...
Feb 13th
this is all very unexpected.  I don’t know what the future holds. regardless, I think this is a good time to learn from mistakes.  Maybe restore what I had if at all possible, or make something new. I don’t know. I’m speaking like a horoscope. gay.
Feb 12th
wait…what just happened?
Feb 11th
I think seventh grade was the happiest I have ever been, as a whole. Every aspect was so good, and level. stable. I really miss those days…I miss being in a band with nick, and tom, and nathan fucking foster. I miss the innocence of that time.  I remember all I ever wanted to do was play music and be in a band and I would only spend my time doing that and only that. Not that I don’t...
Feb 10th
Feb 10th
Feb 10th
Feb 10th
I used to take a lot pictures. →
some are way too fucking edited tho. most of them I’m pretty proud of tho. what happened?
Feb 10th
Feb 10th
overtaken.
I have zero motivation to do school work. at. all. this is the shittiest part of anything and everything ever.  School. fucking. blows. and pretty much everyone there is a fucking prick.  I mean, yeah. I’ve got my friends. but why is everyone else so fucking aggravating? maybe I’m at a fault. but I digress…
Feb 10th
progress.
it’s going. but still slow. I have more I need to do.
Feb 9th
50 Things we know now that we didn't know this...
ianpaxson: therecipe: dummefotze: ratsandcandy666: elengberg: alegrianasimetria: isotoldyouso: chvnx: 1. Domestic pigs can quickly learn how mirrors work and use them to find food. 2. Grumpy people think more clearly because negative moods trigger more attentive, careful thinking. 3. High cholesterol levels in midlife are associated with an increased risk of Alzheimer’s disease...
Feb 9th
112 notes
cause if I can't learn to make myself feel better,...
and I scream for the sunlight, or car to take me anywhere. just get me past this dead and eternal snow. cause I swear that I’m dying; slowly but its happening. and if the perfect spring is waiting somewhere, just take me there.
Feb 9th
It's okay.
I have good feelings. I have good intentions. I feel better. I feel good. you’re doing exactly what I need. the motivation to do something about myself. you don’t even realize it either.
Feb 8th
1 note
ListenBand: Annuals Song: Brother
Feb 7th
Feb 7th
2,449 notes
12 hour waiting room.
Feb 7th
fuckin
weezer. yeah.
Feb 7th
okay.
I know what I need to do, and it’s going to happen. fuck all of this.  I’m going to do what I fucking set out to do and do it fucking right.  I’m so sick of how I am and I am not going to let it get in the fucking way anymore.  It’s the worse fucking feeling and gets me in the worst fucking places.  I need to change.  I need something different.  I need to get myself out. ...
Feb 7th
Look at your eyes.
they’re small in size but they see enormous things.
Feb 6th
Feb 6th
468 notes
Dear mewithoutyou,
you guys are fucking incredible.  I’ll be listening to you for a long long long time. a lot.
Feb 6th